Happily Ever After Doesn't Just Happen...

We Make it Happen!

Defining compatibility in relationship

Defining compatibility in relationship

November 30, 20232 min read

In the dance of love and relationships, compatibility takes center stage. Picture it as a beautiful symphony where two people, like well-tuned instruments, create harmony and contribute to each other’s overall well-being.

Within this symphony, the crucial element to consider is compatibility. It’s about orchestrating the right arrangements with people and placing them in the correct positions in your life, respecting their boundaries and yours—comprised of feelings, thoughts, desires, behaviors, and beliefs.

Yet, the essential key to compatibility lies in workability, or the lack thereof. Evaluating compatibility involves discerning what is and isn’t workable. In the realm of relationships, being workable means being flexible, negotiable, and adaptable—capable of molding and changing to create a desired outcome.

Imagine being in a relationship where your partner loves watching football, a sport that doesn’t interest you at all. Or perhaps your partner receives a job offer in another country, leading to a move you would have never considered if not for the relationship. In these instances, being workable entails embracing change, developing flexibility, and cultivating a harmonious dynamic.

For a relationship to be mutually satisfying, sustainable, and harmonious, it’s imperative to identify what is workable for you and what is not. Honesty with oneself is paramount; there’s no room for self-delusion or misleading others about your workability.

Some aspects of our character are unwavering, forming the foundation of our well-being. Others, however, are malleable, like modeling clay, and must be shaped for the sake of our collective well-being. Recognizing the difference allows us to navigate the landscape of compromise in relationships.

Compromise, defined as ‘settling a dispute through mutual concession’, involves giving up or giving away something of value. It’s crucial to note that compromising in a relationship by sacrificing something valuable leads to pain and disharmony.

When assessing workability, enter the realm of compromise with caution. Compromising on significant matters may seem feasible initially, but over time, it can breed pain and resentment. Instead, embrace the concept of compatibility—a scenario where both parties find agreement and alignment without sacrificing anything of high value or enduring pain for the other’s sake.

In the world of compatibility, there’s no belief in mutual sacrifice. It’s about creating a win-win scenario, ensuring that neither party experiences pain or resentment. This perspective rejects the notion of meeting halfway and embraces the idea that loving someone means safeguarding them from pain, just as they do for you—a beautiful symbiosis in the symphony of love and relationships.

blog author image

Irena Polyakova

Irena, a passionate Life and Relationship Coach on a mission to transform the statistics on loneliness. With a deep-rooted desire to help people find love within themselves and in a healthy relationship, she draws upon her own experiences and a wealth of knowledge acquired through rigorous academic and life education.

Back to Blog

Copyright © 2024 Irena Polyakova | All Rights Reserved